Are you a selfish mother?

You don’t enjoy the ‘joys of motherhood’.

• If you often feel like a bad mother because you simply cannot stand the sound of your children’s vibrant, laughing voices anymore…Welcome to motherhood.
• If you lose your temper and get irritated, when all your child wants to do is touch or hug you…Welcome to motherhood.
• If you’ve seriously wished you could flush yourself down the toilet in an attempt to escape…Welcome to motherhood.

Do most mothers go through this? Yes!
Does this mean you should just accept it and get used to it? Absolutely NOT!

Why am I like this?

Chances are, you are the person that spends the most time with your children.

• Your ears are constantly filled with their voices. You hear their laughs, their cries, their growing vocabulary, their fighting and whining and after a while, it all starts to sound the same.
• You’re the first one to hold them in the morning, the one who kisses the ouchies throughout the day, the one that wipes the tears, the one who rocks them to sleep and by the end of the day, their touch feels like sandpaper on your skin.

You are overstimulated. You’ve been listening to and touched by your children the entire day and at some point your mind and body just cannot handle any more of it. You’ve become completely desensitised by their cute giggles or loving hugs, because the overwhelm of the day has pushed you to the edge.

Now, I’d like to say that, this is the exact reason why it takes two parents to make (and raise) children, but let’s be honest – not everyone has a second person that can take over some of the duties so they can rest. So at best I can make sure you know that you are not alone.

On that note…

What do you consider as rest?

I’d like you to know that NONE of the following can be labelled as rest or self-care in any shape or form:

• Going the bathroom – alone.
• Taking a shower without a toddler breaking down the door.
• A Nap when you’re tired.
• Cleaning the house – alone.
• Going grocery shopping – alone.
• Having a warm meal.
• Drinking your coffee hot. (not because you reheated it)
• Having an uninterrupted adult conversation.

I have a much longer list, but I think you get the point.
These are basic human needs and many of them chores, disguised as “rest” because we get to do it – alone.
When did that happen?
When did we become so overwhelmed, overstimulated, overworked and over-tired that we need to be completely alone just to be able to complete natural bodily functions? Just to be able to function and hear our own thoughts. Yet, here you are – reading this post because you wondered whether YOU were a SELFISH mother!

You are not selfish – you’re human!

Only, if you’re a mother, you’re not allowed to be. I call “Bull shit!” on that.
You deserve the rest you need.
You deserve to not only be able to take care of yourself, but spoil yourself.

If you get to the point where you feel like this, more often than not and you have no one to share the load with. I want you to reach out to me. I have a private Facebook group called “You’re More than JUST a Mother!” where you get to vent/ask for help without being judged. A group that’s about YOU as a person, not just a mother. You’re welcome to leave an anonymous post if need be. We will look for and find someone we can connect you with in your area, that will be willing to help take the weight off your shoulders.

We will create your village within our community.